the hiatus

For various reasons, I have decided to remove my personal page from the land of Facebizzle.  It may be for a week, a month or forever. I guess I have reached the point where I can’t take reading updates from hundreds of  people whom I don’t have phone numbers for or whom I haven’t seen or heard from in ten years (or more).  These last few months I have found myself hiding more and more stories in my news feed from a number of “friends” – namely the ones spreading racist, narrow-minded links or other silly things that distract me from the primary task at hand: writing, working, exercising, blogging, being a good wife, a great friend and an inspired person.  I found myself more and more frequently logging off from Facebook with a bad taste in my mouth and so for now, maybe forever, I’m logging off for good.  I realise that I may lose some regular blog readers from my lack of personal Facebook to blog links, but I figure that if any of my FB friends really did enjoy reading this blog, they will eventually find their way back here. 

In the meantime, if you are one of those people who relied on my personal links to get to my blog and are looking for other ways to keep updated with new posts, you should follow me on one (or all) of the following:

Bloglovin’: this is a great app to have on your phone or iPad – a central site where you can follow all of your favourite blogs and which lets you know whenever a blog you have subscribed to publishes a new post.  Click here to follow midlands musings (and all your other favourite blogs) on Bloglovin’.

Twitter: if you’re not on Twitter yet, you should be. Especially if you’re clever and have a sick good sense of humour. With only a 140 character limit to work with, you have to be razor sharp to get your point across in one update.  Follow midlandsmusings on twitter by clicking here.

Instagram: the ultimate hipster app, Instagram has exploded in the last few months. An instant photo sharing application, it’s the perfect platform to display your mad photography skills or simply share snippets of your daily life with friends and followers. Follow me on Instagram by clicking here.

Pinterest: Well, now. This is the female equivalent to the X-box. If you possess a vagina and you’re not yet a member of Pinterest, I’m not sure if we can be friends. {I KID. KINDA} Be prepared to lose hours of your life to this magical wonderland.  In fact, I have literally been pinning inspiration and motivation into my daily life since I joined in 2011. Game-changer. Also, great for virtual window-shopping when your bank account is empty. Follow me on Pinterest by clicking here.

Facebook Fan Page:  I do still have my Midlands Musings fan page on Facebook linked to an anonymous administrator from which I will link my blog posts every day. To like Midlands Musings on Facebook, click here and then click the little thumbs up Like button (some people really battle with this part).

Email Subscription:  If you visit my blog’s homepage and scroll down a bit, you will see an option on the right hand column saying “follow blog via email” – simply put in your email address and you will then be sent an email every time a new post is published.

Easy, hey? So no excuses for not keeping updated – I promise I will try to share links on all of the above every time I write a new post. Deal?

Have a great week – I’m hoping for a healthy, happy one filled with lots of running sessions in this gorgeous warm weather!

With love x

Me with a pug puppy. To make your Monday better. It’s a pleasure. X

life lately

Andrew and I have been married for six months today. Time doesn’t fly – it feels like six years already.  KIDDING!…… Or am I?  Love you, my light.

I was rear-ended by two cars in town the other day.  Car accidents are the worst.  Luckily I was unharmed, and my car has only a crack and a couple of scratches… but still. Whiplash, insurance claims, police statements, ADMIN.  I am not good at admin.

My colleague returns on Monday from her four week trip to Australia.  I cannot wait to have her back for coffee and chats in the morning and general fun in the office.  Also, she really is good at that admin stuff mentioned above.  Mands, sorry in advance for the crap pile on your desk.

Our water pump on the farm is officially broken, which means no water until Monday evening while we wait for the parts from Johannesburg to arrive.  Rhodes University and Grahamstown is also currently struggling with water issues, though I think there’s may be more due to badly managed municipalities than broken pumps. Sort your shit out EC.

This blog post has gone viral, especially in America.  Peeps are sharing it left right and centre – thank you.  I know Facebook is losing a bit of merit at the moment (especially with their introduction of hashtags and trending – I mean, can someone smell a copy RAT??) but we still need to appreciate the massive sharing capabilities of the Facebizzle timeline. Thank you for spreading the word.

Speaking of THAT blog post, I eventually found the C. Warnke who write that beautiful passage.  He in on Twitter and Tumblr and check, check guys: he replied to my message with DANKIE! What a legend. I wonder if he has any South African blood in him or just knows how to use google translate.  Either way, I’m impressed.

Have dealt with some really rude people this week at work and on the interwebs. Makes you just want to smash something (or them. In the face. With a chainsaw). But I just breathe. And do Yoga.

I reached 700 followers on Twitter this week (hi to all my new American readers and followers – hope you enjoy my little piece of South Africa – you should totally come visit our country and bring your dollas with you :D seriously.) and I’ve also met some of my readers in real life too!  It’s so nice to have people you’ve never met before recognize you and come up and tell you that they enjoy reading your ramblings. You guys make my earth rotate. Thank you!!!!!

I ordered my first laptop. Which I will pay for by myself, through a debit order with FNB every month. Yoh, I am GROWING UP. I also paid for my first car service this month. That was slightly more painful than ordering the laptop.  I can’t wait to write and create on this thing of beauty. And yes, it’s a MacBook.  After this purchase, I will have officially MacApple’d my life.

Also, just to let you know that it’s CHEAPER to order a tablet, phone or computer through FNB and pay it off over 24 months interest-free than buying it from the shop.  Believe me, I did my research.  It was cheaper even than my mom-in-law buying it in England and bringing it over for me next month.  So, if you’re not with FNB, you should be.

This weekend I have no plans other than a massage with Colleen at Midlands House of Healing and my flower girl’s fourth birthday party.  There will be lots of reading, relaxing, sleeping, walking, and of course, yoga.  Have a great one my lovelies!

With love xxx

Image: source

a blogger competition and taking the leap

This weekend was my first solo wedding weekend.  My boss took the long weekend off and I held down the fort at Netherwood.  It was a pretty successful weekend – I survived the long hours, drunken wedding guest advances, the mandatory bumps and hiccups (such as searching in the dark in a spooky office on the other side of the farm at 9pm for a round two-point plug) and, thankfully, NOTHING BURNED DOWN.  In the midst of this long working weekend, something amazing happened.  It started on Friday, when Tash over at Raising Men tweeted about an awesome competition for bloggers with Getaway Magazine and the Knysna Oyster Festival.  I have always wanted to go to the Oyster Fest – you know how much I love oysters – I mean, my blog author image from the beginning of Midlands Musings was this one of me and a big plate of oysters (and champagne):

Tash had me at oyster, and so I hopped on over to theGetaway blog to take a look.  The prize looked absolutely amazing – five days accommodation, passes to wine and food festivals, oyster shucking, wine tastings, market visits…. oh, and a mandatory BUNGEE JUMP.  Case closed.  I’m so scared of heights that I’ve actually become accustomed to doing the walk of shame, though crowds of smirking kids, back down the stairs from the scariest waterslide at uShaka Marine World.  Laugh all you want, kids, I know my limits.  So I sent Tash this:

Haha, Tash was gunning for a co-pilot from the beginning.  And I totally played along.

And so the banter on Twitter continued, until eventually I succummbed and entered.  With people like Natalie Roos, Natasha, Kirst from The Jolly Jammer and Kayli Vee all entering too, I knew I stood no chance.  But enter I did.

The idea of the two of us going together escalated and soon we had support from some of our readers and fellow bloggers on Twitter saying they’d love to see us both go on the trip.  Even Miss Roos gave us her stamp of approval:

By Friday evening I was panicking and regretting my entry.  Just the thought of maybe winning and having to jump off Bloukrans was making me hyperventilate.  Tash reassured me that there was no way either of us would win and that they would definitely choose Natalie or Kayli.  On Saturday morning, I was pretty confident that there would be no bungee jumping happening in my future, so when Tash messaged me to say that SHE had in fact won, I was super happy for her, a little envious, I won’t lie, but mostly massively relieved that I would not have to jump off the world’s highest bridge anytime soon.

And then:

Heart stopped.  Sick to the stomach.  Sweating palms.

Somehow we Tash had convinced them to bring me along.  There was congratulations, well-wishes, lots of screeching and even a mention of a video…

So yes, in exactly two weeks, I will be heading off to Knysna with my favourite blogger for a girls’ week of oysters, wine, play and THE JUMP OF DEATH.  I’m dealing with this impending bungee jump thing the same way I deal with most things that scare the shit out of me: by ignoring it and focusing on the fun stuff instead (Hotel! Food! Wine! Travel! Tash!).  I will worry about it when I’m standing on the edge of that bridge.  I will close my eyes and pray that the adult diaper I’m wearing is tight enough.  And then I will jump.

Stay tuned for more information on our upcoming trip, our itinerary and all things Knysna Oyster Festivalish.  Hope to see you there in the first week of July!

Keep updated by following us on Twitter and Instagram and stay tuned to our blogs, as well as the Getaway blog, for more information, funny stories, a little wining and dining and probably a whole lot of screeching!

Tash – Twitter and Blog

Kez – Twitter, Blog (you’re on it, obviously) and Instagram

Images: courtesy of Knysna Oyster Festival

retweet this exclamation mark smiley face

I’ve always been a people-pleaser.  I love to make people happy and I hate hurting peoples’ feelings or upsetting anyone.  I also have a massive problem with taking things personally or being criticized, even if it is constructive.  So, basically, I’m a bit of a spineless wet blanket with massive insecurity problems. I don’t know how I turned out to be such a little softie, especially when I am blessed with a sarcastic sense of humour and a foul mouth.  I am probably a good mix of both parents – my dad is soft-spoken and a general all-round nice guy, whilst my mom is fiery, sarcastic and blerrie hilarious.  So there you have me – the dirty joker with a massive soft spot for all living things – even human beings.

This has left me with a bit of an identity crisis on Twitter.  You see, I want so bad to be cool and sarcastic like some tweeters (no yays! or exclamation marks.  In fact, not much joy at all.  Just clever, catty remarks with fullstops), but then I also want to be positive and happy and joyful like other tweeters – you know the ones – lots of inspiring quotes, smiley faces and high-fives.  I’m battling to find the middle ground.

Not that I ever used to give a shit about what I tweeted.  When I first started tweeting back in 2009, it was to follow celebrities (you know that’s why you first joined too), to follow my friends and retweet funny jokes by comedians.  But then I started writing a blog, and then I linked it to my twitter page and before I knew it, I had 400 people (not a massive amount, but still a pretty substantial amount, since I’ve never met many of them in real life and only about ten of my actual real-life Facebook friends have Twitter) following me and reading my tweets.  Enter the ego-pumping re-tweet, the reply, the favouriting and the attention.  They love me, they really love me!  It’s like you’re a rockstar in your own little fake world.  If I write a tweet and lose followers (this morning I had 410 followers, by lunchtime I had 405 and now I’m on 406), I’m like, oh my god, what did I say wrong??? Was it because I said “arsehole”?  Did I sound too happy?  Ah, man, I used an exclamation mark! Shit!  I’m judging myself on what people I haven’t even met in real life think of me.  Ah, social media, what a mind-fuck.  (On a side note, since when did it become so hip to be mean and miserable?)

There is a fine line in the Twittersphere between sharing your thoughts and becoming an attention-grabbing social media whore (*cough* Amanda Bynes) and it’s scary to think that you can base your entire self-worth on the amount of followers you have and the number of re-tweets you get.  I realised how bad my twitter/attention addiction was getting when I went away for three weeks and didn’t have access to 24/7 internet connection.  I’d be doing something, think of a funny little tweet about it, and then realise I didn’t have my phone on me to send it out and share with everyone.  I had to take a step back and evaluate what was happening.  OKES, I WAS THINKING IN TWEETS.  And then, when I finally did manage to get on Twitter, I was so lost and out of the loop that I’d just scroll through the feed and then maybe say something about my awesome honeymoon – to which people would reply that I should get off Twitter and back into the bedroom (rightly so). Now that I’m home, I’ve been on Twitter non-stop again, and I’m terrified that my followers are going to drop below 400.  Every tweet I send, I send holding my thumbs, worried I might offend someone.  Sad.  I worry that the sarcastics will think I’m being too sweet, I worry that the spirituals will think that I’ve lost my way and I worry that my friends will not recognise who I am anymore (*cough* Amanda Bynes).  I must be the biggest worrier and over-thinker in the world.  But no more, I tell you, no more.  I’m too old to worry about what others in the playground Twittersphere think of me, so from now on, when I do tweet I am going to tweet about whatever I feel like, whether it be a spiritual quote, a dirty joke or just a hiya to a mate.  I will not be influenced by the tweeting hipsters anymore – I am who I am – a bit of a dirty-mouthed pirate hooker (in the non-sexual way), but mainly, and mostly, a big nerd.  One of my last tweets of yesterday was about how stinky the pigs are on our neighbouring farm.  No one really wants to know that, do they?  But, hey, it’s my life (the farm, not the pig shit) and I’ll tweet about it.

Also, while we’re on the subject of Twitter, can we please bring back the re-tweet?  Favouriting is for pussies.

One love. X

The vanity amazes me.  Shotgun to the FACE.

what i have loved and learnt in march

So it’s almost the Easter weekend and it’s month end (which on a farm is paramount in stress levels to bungee jumping off a building… into a sea of sharks) and I plan to use this weekend to relax to the max.  So in case I don’t see you until April, here are a couple of things I have loved and learnt in March (jesusmaryandjosephicantbelieveitsalmostapril):

1.  My newly wedded husband.  After this month, we’re not so much newly-weds anymore.  That is until we go on honeymoon in May, and then we’re going to rape that phrase to get as much free shit and upgrades as possible.  Oh, you knows it, baby!

2.  The last days of summer… The 21st of March was officially the autumn equinox, so I’m super chuffed we managed to get a few sunny days and balmy evenings in before the winter chill sets in properly.  We’ve had a taste of the cold already, and I’m not looking forward to it.

3.  Spring cleaning my house.  We have finally sorted out all kinds of messiness hidden in cupboards and in draws and which was over-looked during the whole wedding planning saga.  Un-cluttered house, un-cluttered mind.

4.  The health kick.  I have absolutely adored watching Andrew and his self-written Plan of Action – there is nothing better than witnessing someone who usually drinks like a fish, smokes like a chimney and eats like an Italian man with ten pasta-making mothers, getting fit and healthy.  He’s lost 5kgs, can fit into his old jeans and is actually the one motivating me to get up and running in the morning.  Did I mention how HAWT he is looking??? Yay for health, yay for fitness, yay for taking action.  There is nothing more annoying in the world than a person who bitches about their weight and then orders a massive burger and chips.  Follwed by a slice of cheesecake.  And washed down with ten gallons of beer.

5.  Getting creative.  This month I have been writing a lot and making some pretty stuff for my house.  While I do miss the moolah that comes with having a full-time job, I am loving all the time I have had in March to just sit and think.  Coupled with the health kick (very little drinking, therefore not many hangovers), I have written some of my best posts this month (in my own humble opinion), including this one, which has brought a load of new readers and followers to my blog.   I may have been a little anti-social this month – but I like to call it self-care, focusing on my talents and developing my future career.  It would seem that I am not a drunken, intoxicated kind of functional writer.  I need a clear, focused mind to write my shiz and hopefully be successful, and if my social life has to suffer a little bit for my dreams to come true, then so be it.  A little more hard work and a little less partying never hurt anyone.

6.  Twittering like a twat (as Andy would say):  I am loving Twitter this month.  There is nothing better than having a good laugh at some of the cool banter going on on Twitter (Che, you know I mean YOU).  I’m following some really cool, like-minded people and if any of you guys feel like coming to visit me in the Midlands you are more than welcome to come try out our coffee machine.  I might even bake a cake….maybe.

7.  Looking forward to April:  There are some epic weddings and hen do’s happening over the next couple of weeks so April is going to be awesome. And probably not as sober as March, but hey… life happens.

8.  Forgiving and letting go:  One important lesson I have learnt this month is that you cannot change people, as much as you’d like to.  Nor can you help them if they’re not willing to be helped.  You just have to accept them for who they are, forgive them for anything they might have done to hurt you, put them in a bubble and blow them far away (I’m taking figuratively here, no need to hire any hot balloons).  The only person you can change is yourself.  Don’t waste your time and energy moaning about others or wishing that they’d see things the way you do.  They will only see when they are ready.  Until then, love them, support them, forgive them.  Move on.  You have your own shit to worry about.

9.  Stop worrying about what others say about you.  They might not be saying anything at all.  You might be imagining it. They might be dealing with their own stuff.  Don’t let it bother you.  It’s hard to do, but you know who you are.  You know how kind and big your heart is.  You know how deep you love.  I read this beautiful quote off a great website called  Marc and Angel Hack Life, and it suddenly all made perfect sense:

Never let someone’s opinion become your reality.  Never sacrifice who you are because someone else has a problem with it.  Love who you are inside and out.  No one else has the power to make you feel small unless you give them that power.  You are the only one who can create your happiness.

Boom.  BE WHO YOU ARE.  Unashamedly and unapologetically – because you sure as fuck can’t be anyone else.

10.  Chocolate.  ‘Nuff said.

Happy Easter you all – see you on the flip-side.